The Holy Spirit's Anointing

What I am about to tell you is a really crazy story.  I don't know how to explain it, quantify it, or reason with it, and none of that matters to me.  What does matter is that it happened.

10/23/2011 (around 10:30 PM)

Seventeen months ago (to the day) I began praying for the empowering ministry of the Holy Spirit to manifest itself in my life.  Today that prayer was answered.

On that day, May 23, 2010, the day traditionally celebrated as Pentecost and the day before I began my mission trip to Kenya I was given a divine appointment from God with a man who had been anointed by the Holy Spirit and inspired me to give serious consideration to the possibility of the spiritual gifts mentioned in the Bible and a direct encounter with the Holy Spirit to become a part of my life.  Ever since then, my desire and prayer for these gifts have increased.  I have come away disappointed many times after asking God to anoint me with the Spirit but I was persistent and unwilling to give up on the idea that what was possible in the early church should be possible for me today.  Many of those times I thought that I had just neglected sanctification too much in my life and that is why God had not given me the experiences I had asked for.  But today, it happened.

Drew Martin, my roommate and ever so dear friend had been sharing recently an example of the power of God in his life that had completely destroyed lust in his life.  This is amazing gift and manifestation of the Holy Spirit in and of itself, but it fails to compare with what it would result in.  I have recently begun to experience a far stronger hatred for lust than normal, but so often I had failed to over come it through prayer or will.  I saw the work God had done in Drew's life and wanted it for myself, so that I could be purer and more holy and more pleasing to God.  I knew that some gifts of the spirit are passed on by the laying on of hands, so today when we were together in the apartment after watching the Princess Bride at Lauren's I asked Drew if he would come into my room, lay his hands on me, and pray that God would give me the same gift of complete freedom from lust.  What followed was indescribable.  I will try to describe it anyway.

Around a minute into his prayer the Holy Spirit came into the room.  I don't mean to suggest that He wasn't there before, but I do mean to say that came into the room giving us an experience of his holiness, love, and power in far greater magnitude and quality that either of us have ever dreamed of experiencing.  As He entered, I began breathing very deeply and trembling, paralyzed at His presence.  Drew felt the same and began to acknowledge the Spirit in the room in his prayer.  He was praying much louder than at first and couldn't control it.  Soon I began to feel Drew's hands on my back become hotter and hotter.  I thought that if God wanted to, he could use those hands to melt into me and kill me.  Even more impressive than the sensations was the overwhelming feeling of simultaneous joy and fear at His presence.  I now understand by experience the fear people had from angels and how joy and fear can be felt so easily together in the presence of God.  The entire event was amazing and crazy.  We were being anointed by the Holy Spirit.  I must say that this baptism was much cooler than the one with water.  After about 10-15 minutes the Spirit settled down on me though Drew continued to experience it for around 5 more minutes.  We then sat together marveling at the beauty and terror of God's presence and the amazing gift we had been given.  Then we read a few passages of Scripture that speak of the Holy Spirit and its gifts and power.  We have truly experienced the power of God and will never be the same.  This is one of the most important things that has ever happened to me.  I will not forget it.

This all sounds crazy.  The most amazing part of it was not that God can reveal himself to people, but that He chose to reveal Himself to me.  I'm just a kid who splashes around in spiritual puddles far more than I dig deep wells in God's love.  However,  I am so thankful and truly blessed.

What is even greater than this, based on the scriptures and stories of other people's encounters I am led to believe that this may only be the beginning.  God will probably manifest His power in us in other ways soon.  I am excited and eagerly anticipate seeing what God will do next.  I am His lowly servant, I pray that He will use me.

The Choice Has Been Made

Christianity really is different.

Sometimes I wonder how I stumbled into as close a relationship with You as I have (not that it's anything impressive for my sake).  It often seems like a lot of trouble.  It'll feel like You're stretching me too far for my own good.  Sometimes it even feels like I have no business trying to do what I'm trying to do.  After all, it is hard to imagine that I could really make a difference in Your enormous plans.

Plus it causes me stress and even grief on a daily basis.  It's the enemy's world out there and living in it with other people living in it while still trying not to be of it often seems like a worthless pursuit.  On top of all the other pressures of being a student and a person I'm supposed to be an example and a light to my peers? It's not always the easiest thing to be motivated to do.

Also, being in the presence of sin does a lot to a person whether they're actually tempted by it or not.  I remember being a freshman and seeing the difference between the presence of sin on campus and at home and the difference wore on me daily.  Just because I spend less time in the presence of this sort of sin does not exempt me from living in this world and being constantly more aware of the sin inside and outside of me.

Not to mention that some of the primary (though ill-founded) reasons I began to take Christianity seriously in the first place no longer exist.  And much of my motivation to be found deeper in You still remains suspect. Whether it be Christian friendships, religious pride, or even the enjoyment of having theological discussions, all present a temptation for me to feign my relationship with You, sometimes without my own awareness of doing so.


But You Lord, have a plan for all of this.  Even though I fall, fail, miss the point, and am unable to purify my own mind, You love me.  You have placed infinite worth on my life by paying for it an infinite price.  Nothing in all creation can change this love You have for me.  Thank You.

When I look back on my life I hope that I can say truthfully that I did everything for one reason alone: because I love You so much and because You loved me first and died to save me.

Certainly nothing else is worth it.


But with my pathetic human wisdom and my pathetic human commitment I lose focus so quickly and cannot see the true worth of Your love.  I end up subconsciously falling back on insufficient reasons.  I have no doubt that in Your sight it is as some sort of idolatry or hypocrisy.

Change my heart and make it all about You.  Then it becomes truly worth it.

The choice has been made.

There is no looking back.

I have stepped over the line.

I will not let up,

back up,

give up,

or shut up.

My focus is clear.

My path straight.

My God reliable.

I am a disciple of Christ.

May I be able to claim these words.

God of Heaven

Having not yet updated my blog since my summer plans have been secured, it's time that I refresh everyone on the basic details of my life.  I'm currently working as the youth intern for my home church FBC Augusta.  I get to work with my youth group discipling in various ways as well as help plan big events like camp, DNow, ect.  I have already gotten to experience many of the reasons God has put me here this year.

I hope to let you in on some of those some other time, but I mainly want to leave you with something else for now.

I know that it's a cool thing to do to put some song lyrics on your blog.  I wasn't so sure about this fad, but when I first heard this song from our youth's choir last Sunday, it truly inspired me and I wanted to share this.  It really captures for me the greatness of God.  I encourage you to open up this link in a new tab: God of Heaven to listen to the song while you read the lyrics.

God of Heaven
by Heather Sorenson


God of Heaven, God of all the earth and sky.Master of all nature.
Who gives birth to snow from heaven,
Holds the waves at ocean's edge,
Gives the orders to the morning,
Shows each dawn its place to shine?
God of Heaven, God of all the earth and sky.

God of Ages, God who wrote the Book of Time.
Sovereign Ruler, Alpha and Omega.
Saints before, He's guided safely.
History's pages signed by Him.
Author of our days and hours;
Things to come are held secure.
God of Ages, Alpha and Omega.

God of Power!  God who breaks the darkness.
Righteous Warrior, Champion of His children,
Goes before us into battle;
Good and evil bow to Him,
Those in bondage freed forever,
Victories won at  His command!

God who heals us, God who gives us peace and hope.
God who listens, Carries all our fragile
Dreams and heartaches, wins and failures;
Binds the broken; hides the weak.
New beginnings freely offered;
Who can make us whole again?
God who heals us, God of Power,
God of Ages, God of Heaven,
God of all the earth and sky.



Because God is challenging me in new (and completely unexpected to be honest) ways, it is great that I can lean on Him to be so Great when I'm not.


"This is what the LORD says,
'Let not the wise man boast of his wisdom
or the strong man boast of his strength
or the rich man boast of his riches,
but let him who boasts boast about this:
that he understands and knows me,
that I am the LORD, who exercises kindness,
justice and righteousness on earth,
for in these I delight

declares the LORD

Jeremiah 9:23-24

4 Questions: Part 1

The most important thing about a man is not what he at a given time may say or do, but what he in his deep heart conceives God to be like.  We tend by a secret law of the soul to move toward our mental image of God.           A. W. Tozer

Last week at NavNight, the speakers challenged us with 4 questions in order to give each of us a better understanding of our own faith.  I decided that this would be a really interesting exercise to try here and could also give my friends a look into my faith.  So here goes...

1.  What attribute of God is most real to you?

It's really tempting for me to say something like His unconditional love or His faithfulness to his promises.  Even though those attributes are probably better, I think that the one that is most heartfelt for me is God's wisdom.  

"By wisdom the LORD laid the earth's foundations,

by understanding he set the heavens in place;"

Proverbs 3:19

One of the reasons I chose wisdom is because I feel like I've experienced it for a longer time than any of the others.  Even as a child, I was fascinated by the wonder of God's creation, and I took every opportunity to learn more about it and became quickly concerned with its accurate explanation and understanding.  Even now I see the understanding of God's creation a holy task, because in it we see the His wisdom.

Just as God's was wise in the way He planned the universe (if you can say that a being not limited by time plans), He is wise in planning my life.  Even without mentioning Jeremiah 29:11, (which when read in context only applies to Israel) we have an even greater promise that everything will work for our good.

"And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose."  Romans 8:28

Just imagine the wisdom it takes to make everything work for our good.  My wisdom isn't even sufficient to see how things are working for my good let alone making them work for my good.  Even worse, half the time, my own desires are not for my own good.

If I were asked what quality I pray for most, it would also be wisdom.  I see so many times where my understanding is inadequate, or even more telling, when I look back at my actions and see my foolishness in them.  Actions are a much bigger part of wisdom than we often think.  Jesus even said, "But wisdom is proved right by her actions."  Matthew 11:19  I want God to impart to me His wisdom, and the actions to back it up.

2.  What attribute of God is least real to you?


During NavNight I answered this question with passion, but I'd like to change my terminology to zeal.  I am changing it because in the Bible, passion is always associated with sinful desires; zeal is the quality that is associated with God.

"I will now bring Jacob back from captivity and have compassion on all the people of Israel, and I will be zealous for my holy name."  Ezekiel 39:25


Zeal, which I will define as energetic and unrelenting enthusiasm for God's name, is the one quality that I struggle with the most.  It is a manifestation of the joy that is found in God.  Because I approached my faith so rationally and methodically towards the beginning, I fail so often in the realm of enthusiasm.  This is sad because it is even a commandment in the Bible.

"Never be lacking in zeal, but keep your spiritual fervor, serving the LORD."  Romans 12:11


Although this is the quality that I struggle with the most, it is also the one that I have seen the most growth in recent years.  Much of this is because of a few key relationships that I formed in high school with people who's zeal was contagious.  Enthusiasm is almost by definition contagious and one of the main ways that I try to compensate is by spending my time around people who have it.  That is one of the reasons that I am so thankful for the great friends that I have around me, elevating my spiritual fervor.    Of course, I owe most/all of my growth in this area to God.  Zeal is very difficult to fake and every bit of it that I have can only come from Him giving it to me.

Now I want to talk a bit about how these two qualities are supposed to interact.  First, one caveat from Proverbs.

"It is not good to have zeal without knowledge, nor to be hasty and miss the way." Proverbs 19:2


This means that our zeal should be based on wisdom.  In other words it does no good to have zeal if it isn't based on knowledge.  But also notice that this verse treats zeal as the end and knowledge as the means, which means that zeal is one of the purposes of knowledge and not the other way around.  It is just as bad (if not worse) to posses the knowledge and not use it for its purpose.  We must have zeal and wisdom; spirit and truth.

"God is spirit, and his worshipers must worship him in spirit and truth."  John 4:24

Love Wins...?

After looking at much of the controversy produced by Rob Bell’s new book, Love Wins, I decided to read it in order to get a better idea of what it actually said.  For anyone not familiar with the controversy, the book is about Heaven and Hell, and points to a theological point of view known as universalism.  A universalist believes that at the end of it all, one way or another, all people will go to heaven.

Now your first reaction to this perspective should probably be

Jesus answered, “I am the way and the truth and the life.  No one comes to the father except through me.”  John 14:6

Good.  I believe it.  However, reading this verse more carefully (and in context) you will notice that this only means that Jesus is the only one who can save you.  Though it’s easy for us to add on to this verse that you must be a Christian to obtain this salvation, it doesn’t explicitly say so.  The thing we are to take from this verse is that Jesus is the only means of salvation.

A couple years back I started struggling with this issue as I was trying to witness to one of my friends.  I started looking through the Bible to find everything the Bible says about hell and came to many of the same conclusions that Bell did.  Unfortunately, Jesus wasn’t as clear on the subject as we’d like Him to be.

So I got my own copy of Love Wins and have now read it.  Before I give my criticisms on it, I must say that it was truly enjoyable to read and even inspired me to want to be a better representative of God's kingdom.  I think Bell has a true talent for sharing the gospel, in a clear and encouraging way.

However, even with my meager knowledge of the Bible and the Greek language, it was obvious to me that Bell had made many unfounded claims about certain passages that obscured their true meaning.  Because of all of the fallacies and deception in the book, I've lost much of my respect for him.  I cannot recommend for anyone to read this book because one could very easily deceived by the quotes taken out of context or by the fabricated meanings for several Greek words.

When I looked at this issue a few years back, I studied many difficult Bible passages and concluded that it would not be unbiblical for God to save everyone in the end.  However, the majority of the evidence does not point that direction.  I think that it would be great if God saved everyone, but God whose  “understanding no one can fathom” Isaiah 40:27 may think it better not to.

As far as the critics go, I think most of them miss the point.  Hell is a real issue that Christians and nonchristians both struggle with.  Rob Bell does not fear the really hard questions about it and neither should we, because God sure doesn’t.  Also, the book does a great job at bringing heaven and hell into the present tense.  His criticism of the modern church being more concerned about the future than the present was truly convicting.

As far as the inconsistencies, I hear passages quoted misleadingly to promote the opposite side of this issue just as much (if not more).  It is time that we all become honest about our questions and our own inability to answer them.  It also wouldn’t hurt us to take our questions to the One who’s big enough to handle them.

“Knowledge puffs up, but love builds up.  The man who thinks he knows something does not yet know as he ought to know.  But the man who loves God is known by God.”  1 Corinthians 8:1-3

Beginnings

So I guess I'm starting a blog.  This should be fun and entertaining.  I don't think I'll be very consistent, but hopefully I can do enough that it will be useful.  I want to do this to help myself become more intentional about learning what God has to teach me and to share this with others.  I have a journal and my favorite thing about it is that through writing in it I learn more about myself and about God.  I hope that the affect will be the same with the blog.  

About the title: I named my blog "A Breath from Heaven." I hope that you can see the purposeful verbal irony in the phrase.  First, it refers to the way we were created with the breath of God. 

The LORD God formed the man from the dust of the ground and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life, and the man became a living being.     Genesis 2:7

My life come from Him, therefore I am the direct result of a breath from heaven. Not only that, but I was revived by His breath, and I received the Holy Spirit by His breath.  

And with that he breathed on them and said, “Receive the Holy Spirit."     John 20:22

So my life was created by God's breath and the proof of his salvation in my life also comes from His breath.  He is more ways than one the beginning of my life.

The title's second meaning is "A Breath [away] from Heaven."  It implies that all that I am guaranteed is the breath I have right now.  I could be taken away at any moment to heaven.  For me, this means two things.

     1.     I need to live my life to the fullest, doing as much as I can with the                time I'm given. 

Be very careful, then, how you live—not as unwise but as wise, making the most of every opportunity, because the days are evil.     Ephesians 5:15-16

     2.     I must put my worth in heaven, where it will last.

“Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moths and vermin destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moths and vermin do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also."  Matthew 6:19-21

Though in one way the day that I die will be and end, in a much bigger sense it is a beginning.  So my prayer is that God will continue to breathe into me so that my life stories will be a part of His life story.